An Eclectic List Of What Makes Me Happy

An Eclectic List Of What Makes Me Happy

I went out last night, and spent most of today napping between my bed and the couch. Confession time - I gave up drinking over ten years ago, so I couldn’t blame it on a hangover. Oh, and I also went home earlier than the others (I was in my snuggly PJs by 1am). I reheated my leftover nachos mince for lunch (my first meal of the day), and since I had no plans to move much today, I made the executive decision that I could procrastinate going to the supermarket for another day.

If my Mum is reading this, yes I did get out of bed long enough to feed the cat. Since no human life depended on me that warranted staying out of bed, I embraced the Italian philosophy of ‘Dolce far Niente’, which means ‘the sweetness of doing nothing’. It doesn’t mean being lazy, it refers to the pleasure you get from being idle.

You can say that this is an eclectic collection of thoughts and musings of what I’ve learned about life and love over the last two years. Here’s to the old me, who I am today, and the adventures yet to come...let’s drink to that!

# 43 Scrambled Eggs

Scrambled eggs - seasoned with garlic salt, cracked pepper, parsley and a bit of buttermilk. A little under-seasoned with the salt, but it wasn’t overcooked and dry so I was happy with the effort. I promise I haven’t lost the plot, but I wanted to share something pretty significant that happened. Yesterday, I cooked for myself for the first time since April of this year.

Instant noodles don’t count, just saying.

For those who only know me through me writing, I LOVE food, I really do. Both cooking and eating. My mum and sister both tried to teach me to cook in my late teens, and much to their frustration, I didn’t really try very hard. When you have two amazing cooks at home, why would you want to ruin a good thing? It wasn’t until I was in my early twenties, when I met my ex-husband that I had a new-found motivation to learn how to cook. You could say I saw a life with him and didn’t want to spend the rest of our lives eating takeaways.

My pots and pans are currently in storage, as well as my spices. Cooking in my mum’s kitchen felt awkward, whereas in mine, even in the mess that it was, I knew where everything was. Memories of my teenage years came flashing back, and all I could do was giggle. No matter how old we get, and our relationships with our mothers shift, there’s always that little girl that is mortified if we scratch that non-stick pan.

JC sat in the conservatory, jealous of my bowl of food. She loves food too, but she is on a diet.

Change, no matter how small, still feels uncomfortable. That’s human nature isn’t it, to feel resistant to the unfamiliar? My scrambled eggs is only the beginning, how would a knife feel in my hands after so long? Clumsy probably. Until it becomes a part of me again. It takes me back to my teenage years, standing in the kitchen, instructions swirling. As a grown woman, I can look back and laugh.

My book is coming along, slowly but surely. I’m holding it back, I’m my own self filter. Even though I am an open book, there’s some things I still don’t know how to verbalise, maybe never will, or just don’t need to. Those are decisions I need to make as I continue to move on. My story is evolving, and I no longer feel stuck in the mud.

As I finished the plate of scrambled eggs, I began to feel excited. There are two portions of peacock fillets in the freezer, given to me by good friends. I’m going to cook them for our next potluck dinner, and my friends and I are going to create new food memories together. Mum will probably appreciate a break now and then too.

I will never be a domestic goddess, but at least you’ll never starve in my house.

#2 From the outside in

I often think about why it's so easy to focus on what we don't have, than appreciating what we have.  Then it hit me this morning - we see what is in front of us, but in order to see ourselves, we have to look at a mirror.

Have you watched the video where a person describes themselves to a forensic artist, and when strangers described them, the later is always more attractive than how the person sees themselves? 

I am a NZ size 14, in my teenage years I was a 10 or 12, and as I've gotten older I stopped stressing about my number, but how clothes fit my body and how it made me feel. I didn't see the use of holding on to a pair of size 10 jeans I bought on sale two years ago, "hoping" I will one day fit into them again. 

The food I have been fueling my body hasn't been the best, so I am now addressing that. Not because I want to be a size 10 again, but what I eat affects my mood, and my mood affects what I eat and how I feel about my body. A negative cycle, which I can change if I address why it is that I'm choosing to fuel my body with bad food. Everything in moderation! 

Here's ONE thing I am going to try to help change my attitude with food. I will be telling myself this every day, and challenge myself to limit sugar rich food (processed sugar). Treats are ok, don't guilt yourself

Give it a try and leave your thoughts in the comments below.

  • My body has done amazing things, and it by looking after it, it will do more awesome things.
  • Food is NOT MY ENEMY.
  • Nutritious food help fuel my body to keep up with my lifestyle.
  • What I eat is MY CHOICE. 

Give it a try, every day for one week. I will too, and will post an update next week.

Much love and hugs

P.S. As I finished writing this blog, I just finished a bottle of chocolate Wave. So I am committing to 50 squats today. Instead of feeling guilty about that choice, I will move on and make better choices at lunch!